When Parents Are at War

What Kids Want Us to Know

I am not sure where this post is going. I don’t know if there is anything I can write that will make a difference. Still, I feel led to share some insights about the impact on children of warring parents. I see this over and over in my practice – two people who at one time must have loved each other, who got married and had one or more children, and who, over time, developed such animosity toward one another that their anger suffuses everything they do. Some of them ended their marriages; others did not. Married or not, they end up in my office expressing concern about a child who is depressed or anxious or defiant or failing in school or fighting on the playground. Some of the kids have a great deal of difficulty talking about the tension in their homes; others, like 17-year-old Rae, put it right…

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